-S. Daniel, Real Estate Broker
Denver, CO
-J. Turner, Webmaster
Austin, TX
-Robert O., Marketing Consultant
Toronto, Canada
I had purchased your E-book a couple of months ago, and let me tell you, it's truly a God-send! What I love about your instructions is they are very open-ended in how one can implement your techniques. One doesn't have to worry about "Oh shit, am I doing what such and such page instructed me to do correctly?!" - it beautifully managed to conjure up a bigger, practical "what to do" picture by the time I was finished reading it that, frankly, I doubt few other e-books on the matter will be able to pull off in their readers' minds. Needless to say, my results with women have been pretty amazing! The "smile your way through" technique alone is incredibly effective. Definitely smacks of the good ol' "small hinges turn big doors" maxim, and does so beautifully! It amazing how it's small things like this most of us men take for granted, instead trying desperately to put up some fake Al Pacinoesque or Johnny Depp look to attract women (and for the record, two gorgeous ladies I know of like neither of these actors :)! Most importantly, what I REALLY appreciate about your ebook is that the methods you implement can cater for men coming from ALL backgrounds - whether they are your average "free spirited" schmoe in the street, or even religious, spiritually inclined types such as myself. You may find this funny, but to be perfectly honest, before purchasing your product, I went through some trepidation before buying it, thinking it was wholly based on "best ways to flirt with women" in bars and so on - a practice that's strongly shunned by the culture I was brought up in. But upon finishing your book, I realized there are some fundamental truths about male / female dynamics that NO one in their right state of mind can deny... and us "religious" freaks have this thing for "truism" :) haha Once again, thank you very much for this awesome e-book. Two more semesters, and I'll be done with college - so, no more tuition fees! Which means you'll be looking forward to having at least ONE person purchase your Deluxe offer from my neck of the woods ;)"
Sincerely,
Arman
Click here to discover how you can get desirable women to approach you first, just like these smart guys did!
November 29, 2005
What to do if she's just out of a relationship
Hey guys,
Before we get to today's episode, I want to give you morning readers a "sneak preview" of today's special announcement. Starting today, and ending this Thursday, Dee 1, 2005 I'm having a holiday sale--all of my products are 17% off. To get a jump on everyone else, simply go to http://www.johnalanis.com/holiday_sale.htm
What I want to talk about today concerns dealing with women who are just out of relationships. I received a great email on the subject (not the first, by the way) and I want to spend a bit of time today on this subject--sometime in your life, you will deal with it.
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John,
like I said before... all of the stuff works together. Sometimes it works so well together, it's scary. I can even tell you my thoughts about exactly how what you teach relates to DD and MM but I am sure you know that already...
I do have a quick question, though. My most succesful automatic attraction system is "setups" through my parents' friends and acquaintances. Recently I was setup with an awesome girl, who went for the c/f, naughty boy-switching stuff like a charm. We had a
date, she was calling me several times a day...the whole thing. However, the day before our second date she stopped calling me and flaked. I called her and left a message for her that this is not cool and if she wants to be friends she should call me. No call.
She broke up with her boyfriend of a year two months ago. The guy sounds like a total jerk by the way. Apparently, she can't handle being attracted to me so soon after her breakup, and she's been really upset and crying etc. Am I blown out with this girl?
Clearly I am going to continue seeing and meeting other women, but as cliche as this sounds this girl REALLY IS different than the others. Should I just press RESET and move on? Is it worth trying to
reinitiate contact at a later time (if I still want to)? Any thoughts about the general problem of dealing with women recently out of LTRs?
best...
--ralph
JA: Thanks for the email, Ralph--good to hear from you. While I would not say seeing this girl is impossible, I would say it's at least several months (4 to 6) before you'll be able to do so. When a woman gets out of a long term relationship, the emotional hangover can last a long time--same thing with guys. Prior feelings keep coming up at regular intervals (sparked by environmental anchors) that will quash any feelings of new attraction. Not too much you can do about this.
It sounds like you've formed a bit of an attachment with this woman, and that's not a good thing. In fact, it's probably the reason she flaked on you--she sensed you were attracted to her (and you confirmed it by calling and telling her it's OK to be friends, the presupposition being you were operating under a different frame in the beginning), and that fired off all the anchors associated with el-jerko.
Remember, attraction is created and sustained via intrigue and mystery--those disappear as soon as she knows you're attracted to her. From the get-go the way to have dealt with this woman was by making her wonder if you're attracted, then maintaining that frame for a long time. As soon as she found out you were, all the attraction was replaced by memories.
The thing to do is to, one, simply date other women (again, you'll find one who is just as awesome--or more so--than this one), keep in
contact with this one, and as time passes begin the attraction process again, this time not letting her know you're attracted.
This, at least, gives you a chance.
On with the fun....
-John Alanis
"The King of Let 'em Come to You"
PS Don't forget about the holiday sale, going on right now! See http://www.johnalanis.com/holiday_sale.htm for details.