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June 11, 2006

What you don't know sure can hurt you...

Dear friends and subscribers,

There's an old, silly saying that say, "what you don't know can't hurt you." Oh please. Back in my "forced celibacy" days there was a lot I didn't know and it always wound up hurting me. So, I went and learned about what was "hurting me" and put an end to that miserable phase of my life.

Are struggling with "forced celibacy" or "semi-forced celibacy" like I was? Or are you just plain sick and tired of being alone? Well, if you'd like to be "in the know" so what you didn't used to know can no longer hurt you, just go to: http://www.johnalanis.com/ultimate_system.htm for an unusual perspective on the matter from a woman's point of view.

Let all the other guys be hurt by what they "don't know"... because the real truth is, "what you DO know can't hurt you!"

On with the fun....

-John Alanis
"The King of Let 'em Come to You"

P.S. To discover new, unusual secrets to meeting women now, no matter your looks, age or income, go to http://www.johnalanis.com/ultimate_system.htm

Posted by john at 04:11 PM

Afraid you can't keep a woman happy?

Hey guys,

One thing I hear in the "background" in my conversations and consultations with other guys is they're afraid they can't "please" a woman or "keep her happy." They never come right out and say it, but I can tell it's on their mind, and is affecting their relationships with the women in their lives.

Men are conditioned from an early age that they need to "please" a woman, or she'll leave, and that the way to do so is with gifts, money, favors, etc. It's a big problem, but luckily there's an easy solution.

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You see, women don't like this idea of men pleasing them any more than men do. At first it sounds good, but when they meet a man who showers them with gifts, compliments, and anything else designed to "please her" something just doesn't feel right.

She should feel attraction, but she doesn't. Then she meets a guy who's a naughty boy, creates emotional challenges, flashes a strong, sincere side who does NOT give her gifts, compliments or actively try to please her... and she feels incredible attraction.

Believe it or not, what women want is really simple--they just want a man they feel attracted to. If he buys them things because he wants to, great. If not, that's OK too. Women do not want to be "pleased"--they want to feel attraction.

The act of "trying to please" actually creates "ant-attraction." Why? Because when you start thinking, "Is she pleased with me?" you've let the authority in the relationship transfer to her, and women just hate that.

What she'll start doing when she senses this is start testing you more and more, to see if you'll "snap out of it" and start acting like a man again. She may start demanding gifts, favors, etc., not because she really wants them, but because she wants to see you put your foot down (firmly, yet gently) and act like a man in charge.

Unfortunately most guys think the way to please her is to give into her demands, and when they do that it gets worse. Why? Because you're doing the opposite of what she really wants.

Understand this: women don't consciously do this. In fact, many try not to, but wind up doing it anyways. It's simply a biological behavior, like, say breathing. Luckily, there's a biological answer--quit trying to please her, and start creating attraction (see http://www.effortlesscommunication.com/enter.htm for secrets on creating attraction). When you do this, everything changes. You're in charge, she feels attraction, and she's happy.

Now, being in charge does not mean being controlling and manipulative. Not at all. Nor does it mean not treating her as a partner and an equal. It simply means making decisions for yourself without worrying if she's pleased or not.

Create the reality and present it to her--if she doesn't like it, she'll let you know, and you simply create another option. In my experience most women tend to accept the initial one, happy that they finally found a guy who would do that instead of trying to "please her."

Stop pleasing and start attracting... you'll both be happy then.

On with the fun....

-John Alanis
"The King of Let 'em Come to You"

PS Are you finally ready for a whole new approach to dating, women, and relationships that allow you to create attraction with any woman you choose, any time, any place, any where? Then go to http://www.johnalanis.com/ultimate_system.htm right now

Posted by john at 10:05 AM