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June 18, 2006

Why this woman "tells it like it is"... and why you should listen

Dear friends and subscribers,

Can you really learn anything from a woman about attracting women? Then answer is usually no--many times women will tell you what they should respond to, not what they really do. However, every now and then you'll meet a woman who tells it like it is--and what she has to say is incredibly valuable.

I have good news for you. I've come across a woman who has a website who really does tell it like it is--and what she has to say is incredibly valuable to any man who wants to attract women. I put a link to her website at http://www.johnalanis.com/shelley.htm for you guys to have a look at, and I highly recommend you pay attention to what she has to say.


Sincerely,

-John Alanis
"The King of Let 'em Come to You"


PS Again, that's http://www.johnalanis.com/shelley.htm

Posted by john at 04:59 PM

Are you playing not to lose?

Hey guys,

I tried. I really did. I tried to watch World Cup Soccer, tried to see what the fuss is all about. But I can't. I tried before, and I had the same experience--I just can't watch it.

Why? Because every team plays not to lose. They don't play to win. They don't try to score. If they tie 0-0 both teams are happy--I guess no one's self esteem gets hurt when there's no loser.

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People are excited about the US team. Why? Because they lost one game, tied one, and they're still in it. How pathetic.

Lookit, I'm not trying to be a cultural klutz here. I understand some people like soccer, and see its subtleties, just like some people like to watch baseball and get excited over a "pitching duel."

But it ain't me. Everyone I talk to who's an NFL fan says the same thing about soccer: they play not to lose. They don't play to win. They don't try to score, and they don't try to physically dominate the other team. Maybe we're just missing the boat.

Playing not to lost is a big problem with guys, whether it's true in soccer or not. Most guys play not to lose with women. They're afraid of rejection, afraid of seizing the moment, afraid of taking action. Worse yet, they "settle" for whoever comes along, glad they didn't "lose" but wondering what winning feels like.

Here's the truth: you're never going to learn how to win unless you first learn how to deal with losing. All very successful people have this in common: they hate to lose. They hate the feeling of losing. That's why Belichik, Parcells, Jimmy Johnson, and Joe Gibbs are champions--they hate to lose. That's why Tony Dungy, as decent and classy of a guy as he is, will never be a champion--he doesn't hate losing.

With women, you need to play to win. Women love winners, not guys who "didn't lose." When you lose with a woman, you need to get up, learn from it, and acquire the skills so you don't lose again. That's what all championship coaches do--let past defeats motivate them to future victory.

You have to do the same when it comes to attracting women. You've gotta play to win, even if it risks defeat. Otherwise you'll just be another guy sitting on the sidelines during the championship, another guy who played not to lose.


On with the fun....

-John Alanis
"The King of Let 'em Come to You"

PS Make sure you have the skills to win with women each and every time--go to http://www.johnalanis.com/ultimate_system.htm right now

Posted by john at 10:51 AM