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August 11, 2006

Do you worry about women?

Dear friends and subscribers,

I've always loved Alfred E. Neuman's "What, Me Worry?" saying from Mad Magazine. To tell you the truth, that kind of describes my view on women and relationships. Why? Because I know if one goes bad, I just put my own "system" to work for me, and two (or more) great ones show up. To be as "worry free" as the King, go to http://www.johnalanis.com/ultimate_system.htm right now.

Then you too, can say, "What, me worry?" instead of actually worrying.

On with the fun...

-John Alanis
"The King of Let 'em Come to You"

PS Don't delay--or you may spend a lot of time worrying that you missed out on what may be your last chance to choose your own relationships with women forever! Go to http://www.johnalanis.com/ultimate_system.htm at once.

Posted by john at 04:46 PM

She's mad at you-- what do you do now?

Hey guys,

In just about every moronic TV sit-com there's an episode about the male character doing something dumb and making his wife mad. How does he deal with it? By buying her flowers or other gifts and groveling for forgiveness.

Is this what you should do when the woman in your life is unhappy with you? Or is there another, better way?

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(As a quick aside, why don't these TV shows ever show the man getting pissed at the woman, with her trying to figure out how to make it up to him?)

If a woman gets mad at you, the last thing you want to do is try to make her feel better by buying her gifts or flowers. If you do that, you will link those to negative experiences, and whenever you give her gifts or flowers in other circumstances, those bad feelings will resurface.

If she's mad at you, the first thing to do is examine your behavior, and see if there's a good reason for it. If not, and there are other things in her life making her mad, pay little attention to it, and the mood will pass. Nothing wrong with comforting her, but don't get into the habit of enabling bad behavior.

The other thing to do is to avoid any type of argument--no one every wins an argument, they only remember the bad feelings they bring up. If she wants to argue, simply defer discussion until she is in a better mood--then stick to it.

Understand that all moods eventually pass. No matter how mad she is now, she'll be better in a few days, regardless of whether you give her flowers or candy or anything else. And if you did something dumb to cause that mood, the best thing you can do is simply not engage in that behavior again. Apologizing is fine, but you'd better back that up with action--too many people think apologizing gives them license to misbehave. It most certainly does not--if you screwed up, fix it, move on, and don't screw up again.

That's the best way to make sure she's not mad at you in the future,


On with the fun....


-John Alanis
"The King of Let 'em Come to You"


PS Ready to choose your own relationships with the women you desire on your terms? Then go to http://www.johnalanis.com/ultimate_system.htm

Posted by john at 10:43 AM